Cruddler's Great Adventure
by Needle of Hell
Summary: read it and review it PPPPLLLEEEAAASSSEEE!!!!!!! im begging lmao
1. His FATHER was murdered GASP

One day, Crudler Reinbach McHargon-Jargon XIV was sitting in a sunny field. The grasses waved and rippled around him as he pulled a hair behind his ear. He turned back to the small, plastic figurines he had brought with him.  
  
"Oh, Prince Charming, I love you," he said acting like the woman figurine.  
  
"I love you too, dearest," the male figurine supposedly replied back.  
  
They kissed.  
  
Crudler had a strangely feminine imagination for a male.  
  
Suddenly....  
  
"Crudler! Crudler!" It was a high-pitched, terrified scream. Not completely unlike his own father's voice.  
  
"Dad! What is it now?"  
  
"I-I can't tie my shoes and.... AHHHHHHHH!!!!!"  
  
Crudler rushed to the voice, hidden in the waves of grass. There, lying in the rippling golden strands, was his father.  
  
"Crudler... I... I"  
  
"What is it, Father?"  
  
"I...I'm.... dying....."  
  
Unfortunately, Crudler's attention spa was not long enough for his poor father's pleas. He scampered off after some stray butterflies.  
  
"Crudler! Get back here!"  
  
"Sorry. What is it father?"  
  
"I'm dying! And my shoes aren't tied!"  
  
"Isn't that spiffy?"  
  
"No! It's not!" he sighed. "Crudler, I've been murdered by-" His face paled into the icy cold look of death.  
  
Yet again, Crudler ignored his father, because his attention had turned to a large rainbow fish sanding over his father's dead body.  
  
"Who are you?" asked Crudler innocently.  
  
"I am Mr. Fishee. Wanna drink, kid?"  
  
"Sure, Mister!"  
  
The fish extended a fin, and inside the transparent projection was a glass of milk.  
  
"Golly gee, thanks mister!"  
  
Crudler drank the whole thing greedily.  
  
"MWAHAHAHA!! YOU HAVE JUST DRUNK POISONED PONY MILK!!"  
  
Crudler wiped the milk mustache off his delicate features. "Gee, that's even better! You see, sir, before my mother died, she would feed me poisoned pony milk night after night to help me sleep. Eventually, I built up an immunity to poisoned pony milk."  
  
"Curses! Foiled again!"  
  
"I'm sorry. Hey, wait a minute... my father was poisoned..." Young Crudler's face twisted into a visage of apprehension. "You killed my father!"  
  
"No, dear Crudler. It is far cornier than that simple plotline. You see, Crudler, I am your father!"  
  
"No!"  
  
"Yes!"  
  
"No!"  
  
"Yes!"  
  
"No!"  
  
"Yes!"  
  
"No!"  
  
"Yes!"  
  
"Okay, you're right."  
  
Mr. Fishee paused. "That was easy."  
  
"Yes, well, I' a child and therefore very gullible."  
  
Mr. Fishee nodded. "I should have known."  
  
"I'm even more gullible if bribed."  
  
"Really?"  
  
"Yes. Preferably with candy or small shiny objects."  
  
Mr. Fishee suddenly bared his fans and pounced on little, helpless Crudler. "I AM REALLY A POKEMON!! COME, CRUDLER! WE MUST FIND ASH! THERE WILL BE BLOOD TONIGHT!!!!"  
  
Mr. Fishee grabbed Crudler's hand and they departed though the waves of grass. 


	2. The Pokemon World

Mr. Fishee sprung out of the pokeball. "Yah!"  
  
"Mr. Fishee! Ball-of-Twine Attack!" Ash shouted, punching a fist into the air.  
  
"Yah! Mr.Fisheemon!"  
  
The enemy pokemon was force-fed poisoned pony milk and died. "Good job, Mr.Fisheemon! Now get back into this stupidly cramped pokeball!"  
  
Mr. Fishee awoke with a start, plastic beads dripping off his forehead. He turned to Crudler, asleep in the sleeping bag beside him.  
  
"Crudler! Awaken! We must hurry ourselves to meet Ash and therefore kill him!"  
  
"Ok!" exclaimed Crudler, jumping up and throwing up his hands. "I'm ready!"  
  
Mr. Fishee coughed nervously. "Erm, Crudler... you may want to put on some pants."  
  
"Good idea, Mr. Fishee!" Crudler agreed heartedly, velcroeing on his pants (He doesn't know how to tie his pants just yet. He's quite young).  
  
Mr. Fishee placed Crudler on his back. "Moo," and flew off into the darkness.  
  
They landed a few feet farther ahead, at Ash's feet. "Huh?"  
  
"Ash Ketchup!" exclaimed Mr. Fishee.  
  
"Ketchum," corrected Ash, embarrassed.  
  
"Ash Ketchum! We meet again!"  
  
"So we do. Mr. Fisheemon. I remember you."  
  
"I remember you too. And I have bee wanting to say this to you for several years now. 'Hello. I am Mr. Fishee. You killed may father. Prepare to die'."  
  
"Brave sentiments," scoffed Ash. "You've been following me all these years? Well, I shall show you what a waste those years were!"  
  
Ash threw off his cap, lowered his head, and charged at a stunned Mr. Fishee. Before Mr. Fishee could shout 'There's no such thing as Quidditch!' he was impaled on the ends of Ash's spikey hair.  
  
"FATHER!!!" cried Crudler, rushing to him. "Don't leave me!"  
  
"Ah hah," Ash smiled. "A rare Crudler Reinbach McHargon-Jargon XIVmon! I shall get you yet!"  
  
Crudler squeaked in surprise. "I'm a pokemon too?"  
  
"Crudler, you are as pokemony as a pokemon could poke while playing pokeino and poker while being poked in the eye. You see, everyone in this world is a pokemon... except for us pokemon trainers," Ash raised his head and stuck out his chest like a super-hero 


End file.
